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The death of TV – I’m sure it’s something we’ve all thought about, with streaming services becoming more popular, as well as much more numerous – but is it actually going to happen? Of course no one knows for sure (unless you can see the future, in which case winning lottery numbers please), but as far as I’m concerned I think it’s safe to say that no, TV isn’t going to die any time soon.

The world now is very different to the old world. We as a society are so materially obsessed that even when something becomes obsolete, we’re loathe to throw it away. It’s not like a few hundred years ago, when one tool was replaced by another, and the previous tool was ditched. Now, the new tool and the old tool run side by side, hand in hand – there’s always someone hankering for the old, for the safe, for the known. We as a society hoard, it’s what we do. We as a society love a bit of nostalgia, there’s a part of everyone that yearns for a simpler time. This is really why I think TV will be around for a while yet.

Take vinyl for example – vinyl is the ultimate format that just won’t die, no matter how often we try and replace it. First tapes, then CDs, then the short lived mini discs, and now digital downloads and streaming services – vinyl’s challengers have been many, and often, and yet vinyl is still standing. Granted, sales are very low, but so are sales for all types of music, but vinyl is still selling nonetheless. And long will it continue, whether we like it or not.

I think TV will go the same route – if anything it may get even stronger in the face of competition. We’re currently living in what is probably, objectively, the golden age of TV. Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead, Stranger Things, Mr Robot, American Horror Story, Orange is the New Black, etc., the quality of programmes being produced is currently so high. Now a lot of the aforementioned have been specifically produced for steaming services – the amount of Netflix, Amazon, etc., exclusive programmes we’re seeing is growing – but the biggest are still for TV. Game of Thrones is arguably the biggest TV series in history, and there’s no chance of that becoming streaming only anytime soon. No chance.

And even if TV did start to die, would people want it to? Obviously there’s a generational gap, as with all new technology – my parents, both retired, watch TV like no one’s business. My dad has Netflix, but is still in the free 30 days, and my mum has no interest in it whatsoever, but this isn’t the only reason. Take ITV, for example – would they be any better off if they became a streaming channel? A quick Google search tells me that to advertise on ITV, you can pay anywhere from £2000 to over £1m – I can’t see ITV taking a risk on becoming online only, and potentially losing those sums. We already have a living example of a channel becoming online only – BBC3. Formerly a Freeview channel, it’s now available to stream only, and the impact hasn’t been positive.

Since becoming online only, BBC3 has lost 20% of its viewers – 1 in every 5 people turned off. I’ll admit, I’m one of them. BBC3 used to be easily accessible, simply pressing 7 on my remote and seeing what was on – now it requires setting up. How much, I don’t know, I haven’t watched it once since it became online only. I think this says it all. On top of this, not only has BBC3’s viewership dropped, but the figures suggest these viewers are instead watching ITV2 or E4 – BBC’s direct and immediate rivals. So not only have they weakened their own proposition, they’ve strengthened others.

BBC doesn’t have advertising revenue to worry about, so this issue isn’t immediately a big problem. But if it were the other way around, and ITV2 and E4 viewers were jumping ship to BBC, then the advertisers would be asking questions. A drop in demand means a drop in price, and this is only going to hurt the networks. So why would they do this? If anything BBC3 has been the guinea pig for any potential online moves, and the experiment hasn’t worked. ITV and E4 must be thanking them not only for the added viewers, but for the warning too. Whilst online streaming is great, it isn’t the be all and end all. And TV is going to be around for a while yet.

Mental health, those two words, carry so much power and yet are so chronically brushed aside by those of us who have never suffered with mental health issues. They carry power for a reason – our entire lives, all our memories, emotions, physical and cognitive abilities are stored up there, within that grey matter resting inside our skulls. To even indulge the thought of conditions impairing these things is undeniably terrifying. Perhaps this is why there’s a lack of understanding and empathy when it comes to mental health, maybe it stems from an innate, fearful denial, rather than any sort of brutish ignorance.

Whichever way you look at it, to disregard mental health issues as “a phase”, or telling people they just need to “cheer up” or “snap out of it” is a damaging act.

One in four people in the UK will experience problems with their mental health each year. To put that into perspective, that’s roughly around 16 million people. These are real illnesses. Whilst thinking about this I decided to reach out to those suffering.

*Some names have been changed for anonymity.

Debra, 29 – Anxiety

JP: A lot of people struggle to understand mental health, which leads to a lack of empathy, so from your point of view, what was it like to suffer with Anxiety?

Debra: It was stressful, obviously, and I was away from home in a strange environment, because I was at uni. I felt like no one would understand why I didn’t want to go out and why I was on edge all the time. I told a few of my closest friends at uni because I felt like they could protect me. My anxiety caused me to feel like at any moment I could/would die, I was convinced I had some sort of brain tumour. I stopped going out much and struggled in most of my lectures because I didn’t want people to think I was crazy. I’m quite upbeat and happy in day to day life so having the huge fear on top of me was so out of character. I thought I’d lose everyone and disappoint them.

JP: In a society full of stigma surrounding mental health, how would you like to be treated?

Debra: Just be a little patient but don’t treat us like we’re fragile because then we feel more different and more on the outside!

Lewy, 20 – Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

JP: A lot of people fail to understand what it’s like to live with a mental health issue, in your own words, how has it been suffering with PTSD?

Lewy: If I’m honest, horrible. It’s been difficult to sleep on my own. I cannot walk upstairs in my house without the feeling of someone following me up and watching me, I have the feeling of someone standing over me when I’m laid in my own bed. I just wish people would stop romanticising it too – there’s nothing interesting about walking into a room with a dead body in it, at all, it’s not pretty and people who post photos of murdered bodies and stuff – I almost always guarantee have never seen one. There’s nothing worse than winding up in one of your best friend’s living rooms standing over the body of someone you used to see walking around.

Ryan, 19 – Depression

JP: Based on your experience, what is it like to live with Depression?

Ryan: The simplest way I can put it is like you’re playing the game of life on expert difficulty mode while you watch everyone else stroll along through easy mode.

JP: If you could address today’s society on the problem of the stigma surrounding mental health, what would you say?

Ryan: To people with mental health issues: don’t be afraid to be vocal about your problems and let others know what you’re going through, it makes things a lot easier for those who don’t have a first hand understanding. To people without: listen and be conscious of people’s illnesses regardless of whether they’re physical or not but also, it’s nice to be treated as a ‘normal’ person too, make us laugh and forget about our troubles.

Beccii, 20 – Borderline Personality Disorder

JP: A lot of people have a hard time understanding what living with a mental health issue is like, in your own words, can you explain what it’s like to live with Borderline Personality Disorder?

Beccii: It’s basically like living on edge constantly. So one minute you can be your happy self and feel wonderful about life, and the next minute it’s like your whole world is falling apart. You become this unhappy person who doesn’t want to see friends or even leave the house. I can spend days in bed refusing to even leave my room. A lot of people judge you and say oh “it’s just a phase” but it’s not. The good days are so rare that when you have them you make the most of them because it could be a while until they happen again. You also become incredibly distant from people so you lose friends from that. Relationships are incredibly hard to have as you can’t be stable enough and you feel as if you’re a burden on that person.

Emily, 20 – Depression, Anxiety and Borderline Personality Disorder

JP: A lot of the stigma surrounding mental health comes from a lack of understanding. From your point of view, what has it been like to live with these conditions?

Emily: Sometimes it’s really hard as I generally don’t have people I am able to talk too. My social anxiety often plays up so I tend to stay away from some social gatherings – which made my friends distance themselves from me because I wasn’t a party animal anymore. I had abused alcohol in the form of heavy binge drinking, and I often take paracetamol; I don’t know why, but something in my head says it makes me feel better. I’ve had some relationships where my other half hasn’t been very understanding, told me I was a mess or I wasn’t normal at times – some comments hit my confidence really hard.

Now if I really like someone I’m often too scared to pursue it as I’m scared they’ll think I’m a ‘freak’ or that my BPD will make them run a mile. But most of all what makes it really hard to live with my condition is my parent’s old fashioned customs. My dad believes that mental health isn’t a real medical thing, and it was made up to make money or to put people into categories. My father told me everyone feels like this and tomorrow I’ll feel better – it kind of felt like a knife had been put in my back. I’m not religious but I often pray at night that one day I’ll be normal and be able to have a relationship and go out like a normal young adult.

JP: I see. What would you say to those who brush mental health aside?

Emily: Funnily enough, I often talk about mental health, but when I talk about it, I say that people focus on the physical killers like cancer or birth defects – ‘because it’s easier to spot’. But then I ask them, if it was a made-up thing, why is there a mum burying her teenage son? Or why is there a girl walking down the aisle alone because her father couldn’t cope anymore? Most of all I’d ask this – to the politicians, is all the war, resources, deaths and suffering worth the money we are taking away from helping these people?

MJ, 19 – Depression and Anxiety

JP: Given the lack of understanding of mental health in this country, tell me what it’s like to live with these conditions?

MJ: Depression isn’t about feeling sad or feeling low; it comes with other symptoms that just aren’t recognised and can easily be pushed away. Depression doesn’t just give you a demon to tackle, it brings others along with it. You can find yourself sitting staring at a wall, a window, a TV screen without registering what you’re even doing, and hours can fly by. Depression lands you in a confused state in the early hours of the morning. You cry without realising and your whole body feels like a shell. You are detached from your surroundings, and even more scarily, yourself. You cut yourself not because you want to show your pain, but because you feel you deserve it. The fact that society still looks for the stereotypical symptoms, such as sadness or lack of enthusiasm, just means that you feel more repressed in expressing yourself and seeking help, because you’re told to “get on with it”. Anxiety isn’t not being able to do things because you’re scared or worried – it is your body shaking, and I mean literally shaking with adrenaline; forcing your mind into 100mph of thinking.

JP:If you had the chance to speak about mental health stigmatisation in front of the nation, what would you say?

MJ: You don’t call us crazy until we put the word into your mouths – and even then, you turn your back on us and claim to ‘be there’, that is until we shake with fear over walking to a vending machine, or tear at our bodies trying to escape our demons. Our world is on fire, and it is real.

When I appealed for people to talk to me about their mental health issues, I was staggered by the number of responses I started getting – all from people who want the world to understand what they’re going through, and it was incredibly insightful to hear about their experiences. I’m hoping this reaches people who don’t understand mental health, and I sincerely hope it gives them a fresh perspective. Mental illness is real. Stop pretending otherwise. We need to work together to help those suffering with all types of illness, mental or physical.

Need help, there are lots of Charities – get in touch

1. Mind
2. Mental Health Foundation
3. SANE
4. Rethink Mental Illness
5. YoungMinds
6. Anxiety UK
7. Bipolar UK
8. CALM
9. Samaritans
10. Mental Health Matters
11. OCD Action
12. OCD-UK
13. No Panic
14. Beat
15. PAPYRUS Prevention of Young Suicide
16. Place2Be
17. Student Minds
18. The Mix
19. Hub of Hope / Chasing the Stigma
20. MQ Mental Health Research

Love cannot be forced or fast-tracked. Here are some things to consider before jumping into a relationship.

1. The ‘friend zone’ is the best place to be

She needs to be his best ‘boy’ friend and he needs to be her best ‘girl’ friend. What do I mean by that? It’s not a case of letting your partner do what they do and not having a role in it. You need to be best friends, especially if this is the person you’re eventually going to spend the rest of your life with. If your relationship is not based on true friendship it is bound to fizzle out and if anything goes down, your bezzie will have your back. Ride or die style!

2. You need to have the ‘sex factor’

It is detrimental to be in a relationship with somebody you are not physically attracted to. No, it is not conceited; it is being real. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and we have the ability to appreciate beauty for a reason. How do you expect to maintain a healthy relationship with someone you don’t want to wake up next to every morning? More than likely you’ll end up either cheating on the person or leaving them when you find someone more attractive and this is not fair on them. Let’s face it, sex is important in a relationship and you can like a person’s personality, but when it comes down to making love you need to be physically attracted to them- either that or the “lights-off” technique will be used a hell of a lot.

3. Tell me something I don’t know!

You need to both be on the same intellectual level. Just as it is important to please the eyes, it is equally important to please and feed the brain. Isn’t it horrible when you find someone you’re really attracted to, but as soon as they open up their mouth to speak it’s like you’re talking to an infant? These days I’ve managed to clock onto how intellectual a person is merely by observing their grammar in text messages. Spellings like ‘ur’, ‘wen’, ‘dis’ and ‘dat’ are all clear indications, to me, that we are not on the same wavelength. Go read a book or something!

4. Oh… a little human… exit stage left…

You need to decide whether people with children are a no-go zone. This would not have been an issue 10 years ago but in this day and age it is becoming almost impossible to find someone without child and let me not get started on virgins. Why is it important to decipher whether you want to go there with someone who is already a parent? Because one day you will have your first child and some people would like to know that their partner is going through that for the first time too so you can both share that first time experience together. I myself have a half brother and sister and a full brother and although I am close to my older siblings there is a special bond between my younger brother and me. When I eventually have children of my own I want them to have that same experience.

There are obvious exceptions to the rule such as if their partner died, if they were raped or if you can’t have children yourself. But it is a rule that needs to be thought about. Basically, have kids responsibly cause not every person out there wants to be a stepparent, and it’s not always fair to expect them to be.

5. I believe in miracles. Do you in 2026?

The two of you need to connect on a spiritual level. Whether you’re both atheists or Christians or whatever. You both need to be on the same wavelength and preferably of the same understanding. If you’re not, there will be a lot of conflict throughout your relationship because you believe in different things.

I do not for one second believe that relationships are all about compromise. I believe that each and every person on this planet potentially has a soul mate, destined for them, who stimulates their mind, body, and soul, and who shares ambitions that support theirs; when the time is right, they will be brought together. The moment compromise becomes the key aspect of a relationship is the moment both parties have settled and have potentially lost out on the person destined for them. These are not the words of a 21-year-old female who has watched one too many rom-coms. These are the words of a female who has learnt that learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all and is in therefore no rush to compromise.

Interested and want to read more?

1. NHS – Maintaining healthy relationships and mental wellbeing
2. Top tips on building and maintaining healthy relationships
3. Relate – Relationship support and advice
4. Brook – Relationships and dating advice
5. NSPCC – Healthy relationships
6. Do you suspect red flags in your relationship?
7.  How to spot red flags in dating and relationships
8. MyCWA – Spot abuse red flags
9. RCCS – Healthy Boundaries in Relationships
10. NHS England – Relationships

Lights Out – wow. Bloody hell. That was an ordeal. That was 81 minutes of pure, unadulterated terror. That was one of the most terrifying films I’ve ever seen in my life. It was bloody good.

With a cast of relative unknowns, produced and directed by a relative unknown, and only coming in at 81 minutes, less than an hour and a half, it’s easy to look at Lights Out with some trepidation. I didn’t know any of this before though, fortunately, and had only seen the trailer – you know the one I mean, with the factory, the spot lights, the apartment, the rising and fading light, the…thing…in the dark. Those two minutes were enough to convince me to see this film, and I’m really glad I did.

Lights Out is relentless – from the opening scene in the factory, the one from the aforementioned trailer, to the final scene in Rebecca’s mum’s house, this film does not stop. It’s one fright to the next, with no time to rest in between. That’s what makes this film seem a lot longer than it is – you’re almost praying for it to end, just so the ordeal is over. But when it eventually does, you’re pretty disappointed. It isn’t just terrifying, but it’s a genuinely very good film.

It’s a fairly simple concept, preying on our deepest, darkest fear – namely, the dark. The film is cleverly crafted, in that even during the day, scenes are presented in places that are able to be dark – closets, windowless rooms, spaces under beds. As I said, this film is relentless. The cast, all relative unknowns as I mentioned earlier, all perform admirably. Performances of note in particular come from three of our main characters – Rebecca (Teresa Palmer), her boyfriend Bret (Alexander DiPersia), and Martin, her younger brother (Gabriel Bateman). There’s a new trend in film and TV at the moment – actually decent child actors. Bateman definitely falls in to this category.

Martin is the focus of the maliciousness in the film – he’s the one the monster seems to be following, he’s the target. His performance is very believable. It isn’t stunted, or awkward, like a lot of child actors tend to be – we feel his terror, his fear, his emotions. One of the strongest parts of the film is Martin’s bewilderment – the malice is coming because of his mother, and we can feel as he struggles to accept this. In fact, we struggle to accept this, even though we’re privy to slightly more information from this. His own mum. How can she do that to him?

Rebecca is the rebellious but well-meaning older sister, who’s been through what Martin has already, when she was younger. As such, she’s able to help, to be the voice of reason, she’s our anchor in this film. Palmer’s performance is excellent, she sells the film and the concept totally and completely without fail. And Bret is the comedic relief, though only to a minor extent. There is very little comedy to be found amongst this horror. There were moments the cinema burst in to laughter, and rightfully so – but it was nervous laughter if I’ve ever heard it. It’s the kind of laughter you almost have to force out to remind yourself there are other things than fear in the world. The kind of laughter you hope will scare monsters away.

The plot of the film is nothing ground-breaking, but it doesn’t need to be. The concept, the idea, the acting, directing, script and scene detail is what makes this film so good. I can’t really do Lights Out justice here, all I can say is I highly recommend this film. But with one caveat – if you have a weak heart, maybe stay away. Because this will stop it.

As an English Literature student, an avid reader and an (attempted!) writer, there is nothing that brings me more happiness than the feel of a book in my hands. Not only is it traditional and a thing of nurtured and crafted beauty, but books also bring back memories of childhood and reading before bed. However, in an increasingly technology-based society, printed books and bookshops are having to massively adapt. The rise of the e-reader and the e-book is upon us, but does everyone think it’s such a good change?

According to a recent study, young children are calling for books in print as opposed to e-books even more than they did two years ago! This desire massively conflicts the new age of technology that has largely been aimed at the younger generations. However it seems that e-books and things such as the Kindle have been a huge success with older generations than with younger ones. Younger generations (who have been brought up in the new age of technology) appear to be rejecting e-books and calling for traditional printed pages instead!

While this desire for printed books is fantastic, it’s not difficult to see the huge appeal of items such as the Kindle and other e-readers that take our books from the page to the screen. The cost of the books that you can download are vastly cheaper than buying a printed copy, and often classics such as novels by Charles Dickens or Jane Austen are completely free of charge! The e-reader and books act as an investment piece, further highlighting the financial appeal in a struggling economy. However, are these appealing financial reasons enough to sway the public and make us switch from our printed traditional books, and enter into the 21st century and embrace the e-book?

In my personal opinion, the turn away from printed pages and the acceptance of the e-book as the norm eliminates the humanistic element of the book. As a child, I went to numerous book signings of my favourite children’s authors such as Jacqueline Wilson and Michael Morpurgo; I waited in lines, so excited to have my book signed by the person who wrote it. As an adult my beloved gift of all time was a signed first edition of one of my favourite books.

A physical book is personal, it’s sentimental and most importantly, it’s human. I mean lets face it – you can hardly have a favoured author sign your Kindle screen now can you? While e-books are practical, economic and in the long run cheaper the experience of reading a book fits into none of these categories. To read a book is to experience a world of imagination, wonder and the joy that comes from physically turning those pages is something that should be experienced from a young age. Unfortunately, for me personally, the experience and the sensation of reading are completely lost when I’m staring at a screen instead of a perfect printed page.

What do you think? Would you rather read a real book or a Kindle? Let us know in the comments section below!

I had the privilege of attending a Catholic all-girls secondary school for seven years, and besides a love for science and a strong sense of discipline, the most valuable thing I walked away with was an undeniable, universal love for women.

I spent hours upon days upon months upon years, in an environment where not only were my companions female but also the majority of my teachers, the auxiliary staff and the administration! We even had a convent on the school grounds.

Being exposed to essentially only women from ages 11 – 18 has resulted in an inexplicable need to connect with the women in my life. I think the insular nature of secondary school and the fact that we were all discovering ourselves and the world at the same time led to a bond being forged that honestly I don’t think boys understand, and frankly can’t replicate. Though, in my opinion, it’s not their fault! Boys are taught that it is not acceptable to cry unless you have lost a limb, or perhaps your nan or mum, while we girls are given attention and sympathy the moment we begin to tear up. Now that is a whole other story.

Think about your closest group of girl friends, how you relate to each other and rely on each other for almost everything. Go ahead and scroll through your phone, take note of the amount of pictures you have of your nights out, the group messages you are a part of that consist of two to four of your nearest and dearest, the screen shots in your gallery of messages boys (or girls) have sent you that you have forwarded to a friend for the their opinion or a laugh, recall those moments you popped round to theirs to share a bottle of wine or because you didn’t want to be alone after a break up, or it was Valentine’s Day and you both committed to spend it together.

1. Stonewall
2. Mermaids
3. akt
4. Switchboard LGBT+ Helpline
5. LGBT HERO

See what I mean?

Women are encouraged to share our experiences (‘Did you get your period this month? I think mine is late’).

To have each other’s back no matter what (‘That’s Stephen’s new bird’ ‘I already hate her’ ‘No, it’s fine you don’t have to’ ‘You sure?’ lol).

Uplift each other (‘Do you think I’m fat?’ ‘Are you kidding me? I would KILL to look like you’ ‘Shut up, you’re perfect’).

And because of this never-ending sequence of love and support and commitment, we become closer and closer, forming our own little society. I can honestly say that without my closest friends my life would be decidedly less fulfilling. I don’t know how it is for the lads, but I feel like my girls are reflections of who I think I am and what I’d like to be. I have to admit that I am that friend who is like the mum, and because of that, my best girls are a little crazy and out there; they party hard, travel often, snog lots of boys and have an intense zest for life. If I were left to my own devices I’d be on the floor of my flat almost every Friday night reading or watching Netflix.

Fortunately, I have these women who encourage me to put on makeup, go out, have a few pints, talk to boys and embrace the beauty and spontaneity of life. I like to think that I play a symmetrical role in their lives, offering advice, quiet nights in after too many parties, and homemade sausage rolls while we watch movies. We provide balance and inspire all the aspects of a woman: the mum, the wild child, the introvert, the extrovert, the badass, the seductress, the academic and so much more.

Now I know that there are girls out there who say that they aren’t a ‘girls’ girl’ and this honestly makes me sad, because female friendship is rewarding and empowering. There is simply nothing like it. I don’t think male/female friendships can offer the same type of satisfaction.

Life is difficult. It’s even harder for women. From unequal pay to the physical/sexual/verbal abuse faced by many of our sisters around the world, politicians telling us what rights we do and do not have regarding our bodies, the institutional ‘boys’ club’ in many professional areas (engineering, architecture, finance, science, politics…) and the media constantly barraging us with images of what we should look like, sound like, and act like – it is absolutely imperative to lean on each other.

Go ahead and tell your girls that you love them, plan a dinner, a Skype call, or just go to their flat and dance around to music you haven’t listened to since you were 13. We are going to be bombarded with so much in the next dozen years: heartbreak, children, weddings, husbands, ex-husbands, job loss, migration, funerals, infidelity, sickness, and financial struggles. It is going to be difficult – there is absolutely no doubt in that – and we are going to need each other through all of it. Hold on to your girlfriends and walk through life knowing that you have not only your strength to count on, but that of others to carry you through.

Yo Kanye, I’m really happy for you and I’m gonna let you finish, but Britney had the best break down of all time…

Kanye West has always loved a bit of controversy and attention, bearing the brunt of now countless memes about his self-professed narcissism. Whether you think he’s arrogant or rightly self-confident, there’s no denying he loves the limelight. His recent escapades have made for some excellent trending topics on Twitter (and good office chat), but what is really going on in the mind of Mr West? More.

I guess we should start at what I would call the beginning, on January 27th 2024. Kanye West changed his new album name to Waves (because deciding on an album name for certain is too mainstream). Obviously, this is a blatant rip-off of Max B (?), so Wiz Khalifa decides to give his two cents. Long story short, as you probably know by now, this started Kanye on a bit of a rant with Wiz, which got rather personal, ex’s and all.

Rather entertaining this all was for us mere mortals, it didn’t end there. After renaming the album again to TLOP or The Life of Pablo (cos he’s an artist, geddit?) he has announced publicly that he is in some sort of debt and therefore asked Mark Zuckerberg for a casual $1 billion. I mean, fair play for asking, if you don’t ask you don’t get, right? But it is definitely another talking point.

This could all be a PR and marketing stunt to build more hype for his album, as the release has been pushed back again. This seems like a more plausible answer when you consider the promotion he has been doing for the paid music streaming service Tidal, which his album is available on. Or, he could be drawing attention away from the criticism he has received for the allegedly sexist and derogatory lyrics about Taylor Swift in a song on his new album.

Either way, the Twitter-sphere is waiting for the next instalment with baited breath and a box of popcorn.

It seems like it was always at night when my parents fought, probably to spare their only child the sharpness of their words to one another. However, even as a young girl, I was very perceptive and could tell when the volcano was ready to erupt. Mum and Dad would say prayers with me and tuck me in with the same half-hearted smiles they feigned during Sunday morning church. I was supposed to be sleeping but would tiptoe to the end of the long hallway that led from my room to the kitchen. As I crouched down to hide by the oven to remain unseen, I held my only source of comfort – a stuffed bunny named BunBun.

I’m still not sure why I so desperately wanted to hear what they were arguing about THIS time, but I think I came to the conclusion that it was weak attempt to extract knowledge, to be left in the loop.

On an average day, walking around my house wasn’t necessarily eggshell-like circumstances, but more of a landmine – one misstep and the grenade exploded. My father would come home from work and sit in his recliner, eat dinner, then retire to their bedroom. These phases would last for months and then cycle through times of manic happiness. The silence was deafening and I never knew what mood he would come home in or when something I said would set him off. Since my father is a registered psych nurse, he often turned to self-medication and refused to admit he needed help to feel normal, a struggle I myself battle with to this day. Despite my father’s second-generation bipolar disorder diagnosis, there was never a doubt of how much he loved me (and still loves me). Even then I somehow related to him, an understanding my very black-and-white logical mother would never grasp. I understood him because he and I are alike. We both live down the same strange rabbit hole of mental illness and because of this, building relationships from childhood would prove to be tumultuous and confusing.

My parents divorced when I was in junior high once my mother could not try to understand him any longer. I didn’t know how to react and most of my friends were well off and still lived in their perfectly placed nuclear homes. Over time, things became easier. Both of my parents remarried over the next few years and I myself began dating.

It was then when I truly realized how sick I was. I sabotaged relationships and created chaos because I thought that’s what love was. That was what love looked like to me. I would explode much like my father. My heart would tell me everything was fine, but my head created scenario after scenario that never and would never come to fruition. I became paranoid and erratic and labeled that “crazy chick” you overhear during bro conversations at a bar. I didn’t want to be her anymore. I was sick of her and, if I was sick of her, I knew everyone else around me must be also. I was spiraling out of control and knew I needed help. I knew I had a mental illness that could not be ignored any longer.

At age 18, remember sitting in Stephenville, Texas at a Chili’s Bar and Grill across from my characteristically stoic mother when I broke down into tears and told her I thought I needed help. I was dating my then boyfriend at the time, now my husband, and I refused to allow he or our future children to live in the same atmosphere I did. She calmly said, “I’ve been waiting for you to tell me this.” I guess everyone saw it but me. I immediately felt my face flush with anxiety and embarrassment. Sometimes our qualities we try so hard to hide are the very same ones which are the most obvious.

On July 7, 2007, I married the man who I half jokingly say “puts up with me.” Only it’s not even half a joke; it’s not a joke at all. He is even-keeled daily and is the kindest most patient man I know. That makes our marriage much easier. Instead of calling me crazy or telling me to chill out, he hugs me tighter and understands that there is an element of the illness that I truly cannot control. I stress and worry constantly that he’s going to wake up one day and realise what he signed up for and leave. When I have these irrational fears, he calms me instead of insulting me. And while yes, he is an amazing husband and father to our two beautiful children, one thing that needs to be understood is that, even in long-term relationships, YOU are the only one who can pull yourself out of the chasm of depression.

Our marriage is full of good days and bad days, like any other couple. The key is for us to be constantly aware that there is a giant elephant in the room (one that often needs a stout dose of tranquilizer). Seek a partner who supports you and doesn’t dismiss you. Pray. Daily. Pray for understanding from not only your significant other but for yourself. And last but not least, I cannot stress this enough, DO NOT ever sweep mental illness under the rug. That is where it goes to fester and grow into a parasite that can easily kill a marriage. Talk about where you are emotionally every day. Do it so much that it becomes habit. Being invariably aware of your thoughts and emotions each day fosters a feeling of normalcy. Over the last 9 years with my husband, communication has been the most important offering of respect we grant each other. Don’t hold things in when you’re upset. Let them out in a productive way that opens a healthy dialogue.

I feel like I’m married to both my husband and my mental illness, only the oath that the chemical imbalance has taken with my body can never be broken. The cliché “the first step is admitting you have a problem” is equal parts trite and unequivocally true. I wake up every morning next to my husband and to my inner struggle. Both are work but I have to be the one to put forth the effort. My husband convinced me that taking medicine is OKAY. It is. It doesn’t make me weird or abnormal or anything negative; if anything it gives me a chance at the abundant life I’ve so graciously been given. People may not understand it, but there is truth to the adage “better living through chemistry”.

It’s been a long time since I saw the film The Green Mile, however it quickly stole my heart and became one of my favourites. So it’s no surprise that as soon as I finished my last ever (eek!) year of university, The Green Mile was the first book on my own personal reading list!

The classic novel by Stephen King is classed within the genre of horror and, while the book does contain horrifying situations, The Green Mile manages to turn horror into something amazing and emotionally evocative.

The story follows the events that occurred when death row supervisor, Paul Edgecombe was in charge of ‘The Green Mile’ – this is the final walk that prisoners on death row take before meeting their end. As readers we’re introduced to Paul’s co-workers and the prisoners that face their own personal journey as they wait for their turn to walk the mile. With the arrival of William Wharton, a seemingly insane and inherently dangerous criminal, the normally peaceful and comforting mile is disrupted with the threat of violence and arrogance. However, with the arrival of John Coffey, a prisoner accused of a horrific and brutal crime, things on the mile take an unusual turn.

We’re taken in and out of Paul Edgecombe’s past and present life as he reveals his struggles with Percy Wetmore, the newest and cockiest supervisor on the mile, and we see the reality of the fragility of the justice system in America. As more and more inmates take their walk down the mile, we question whether everyone truly deserves to be there.

On top of danger, violence and unthinkable crime there are aspects of this book that will have you in tears. The notion of inherent criminality becomes uncertain, as we see a glimpse into the humanity that lies behind criminality, allowing King to blur the lines of acceptance of crime, humans and our own morality as readers.

The Green Mile is a classic. Combining brutality with fragile humanity and the desire to expose injustice creates a novel that you never want to end. While the characters may not exist in reality, their stories are ones that will teach you things about yourself that you never thought possible, and their messages will stay with you for a lifetime.

We’ve been waiting months for Pretty Little Liars to return to our screens for the 7th season and last night it finally did. The season 7 premiere Tick-Tock bitches didn’t bring many answers, but gave us a lot more questions. Take a look (unless you haven’t yet watched the premiere, in which case navigate away from this page and stop clicking on spoiler articles).

Who are they burying at the beginning?

The episode opens with Spencer, Aria and Emily digging a grave in a very distressed manner. They feel guilty and Aria even says “Poor Hanna”, so is it Hanna? Spencer reveals a little more detail, saying “It was a well thought out plan. When it turns out like this it’s called first degree murder.” Which would indicate wilful and premeditated killing. They wouldn’t plan to kill Hanna and even if A did I don’t see why they’d be clearing up the mess. This and the “Poor Hanna” comment lead me to believe it might be someone close to Hanna. Maybe Caleb, or even her mum.

Who voted for Spencer and Mona?

When the girls voted on who they thought killed Charlotte, the majority thought it was Ali, Emily didn’t vote, and Mona and Spencer got a vote each. I highly doubt they voted for each other, so who suspects them. Caleb has never made much of an effort to hide his dislike for Mona, so it’s possible he voted for her. But who voted for Spencer? Could it be Toby?

Who is Charlotte’s father?

During the episode Mary Drake stops by Spencer’s house looking for her parents. It turns out that they used to be friends, but Jessica DiLaurentis turned everyone in the town against Mary. Mary said she came back to Rosewood as she’d heard her sister was dead which she presumably only heard about when she came back for Charlotte’s release. As Mary leaves, she makes a comment about Spencer’s ability to stay friends with her ex lovers. I’ve always thought the Hastings were very involved in the drama from the start, despite the focus of the show being on a missing DiLaurentis, but this conversation has me thinking Charlotte’s father could be Peter Hastings. However, if it is and Peter is Mary’s ex lover, why is she visiting him? Their daughter may have just died but he didn’t seem to have anything to do with her. My second thought is that Mary could have tricked Kenneth into thinking she was Jessica and had Charlotte that way.

I wonder if Peter Hastings is Charlotte’s father… The Hastings are way too involved and shady #PLL #PLLTheories pic.twitter.com/0oKyFW3EDd

— Digital Princess (@MohammedBanMohammed) March 25, 2024

It turns out I even suspected Peter at the end of season 6. I’m inclined to think Peter may have then killed Jessica thinking it was Mary, but I like to think Peter is too smart to leave a dead woman’s body on his lawn. However, maybe it wasn’t Jessica that was jealous, but Mary. Maybe Mary killed Jessica after she found out that Jessica and Peter had Jason. She might have felt like Peter replaced her with her twin and so removed the problem.

Who was Mary on the phone to?

When Mona said it was a British or Australian guy, most minds immediately jumped to Elliot who revealed to the audience that he was faking his American accent at the end of last season, but wouldn’t it be great if it was Wren? Wren has been top of my ‘Uber A’ list for a long time. He’s been pretty involved at the same time as keeping his distance. It could even be that he and Elliot are related, but with all the hidden blood ties that have come to light recently it’s doubtful.

Did Ali really kill Charlotte?

Ali being in hospital full of incurable guilt, seemingly confessing to crimes and having evidence from the night of a murder still stored safely in her room seems a little convenient. Ali has waited years for Charlotte’s release, she had no reason to harm her. I highly doubt an attack was provoked either because if Ali did kill Charlotte – deliberately or not – she’d have gotten rid of the coat (that Toby said would have blood on it) soon after the incident rather than packing it away in a box in her room ready to eventually go to Goodwill. My money is still on Melissa, protecting her sister and her family from the train wreck.

Are Dr Rollins and Mary Drake A.D.?

Mary and Elliot seemed focused on recovering Mary and Charlotte’s money via the Carissimi group. Mary may have been in the woods when Hanna was taken, but Elliot was not. He found out Ali was Charlotte’s killer pretty soon after Caleb handed the jacket over which suggests he’s been in contact with the receiver, but was that receiver Mary? When Hanna escapes the barn she stops Mary in her car, so who was the night vision-goggled figure who found the barn empty? Mary could change that quick. Mary and Elliot seemed to be after Ali and wanting answers about Charlotte, not wanting to harm to girls. The person who picks up the red jacket cannot be Mary as in the Episode 2 preview she’s still in the car with Hanna, and it cannot be Elliot as he’s with Alison, so who is it? There are a few theories flying around that Spencer is in on it, but I think that’s unlikely. Andrea Parker, who plays Mary, confirmed that Uber A (mentioned in the episode description and previous episodes) aka A.D is not her. If Uber A has Hanna, Elliot could be in cahoots with them too and that’s why he found out about Ali so fast. While he’s likely to have a hunch, I doubt he’s acting solely off of that. Uber A has been in the game a lot longer than Mary and Elliot, so Mary being on the phone to Wren (as Uber A) would make sense.

Stepping out a little further, could A.D. stand for Andrew Drake? The Radley file would probably mention another child, unless it was after she was released. If Charlotte is around Jason’s age and Andrew is around Ali and the girls’ age then it is possible she had a second child when she got out, and put it up for adoption anyway. However, it makes no sense to me to keep one of your children in the family and let the other one be adopted by strangers. However, since Jessica, Jason and Charles were outside the apple farm in the clip from the dollhouse, it’s possible that the Campbells are somehow family too.

Another wild theory is it stands for Ali Dee, the fake badge Mona used to get out while in Radley. Charlotte stole the game off of Mona, so maybe Mona stole it back.

The wildest theory I heard is that Maya St. Germain is Mary Drake and Eddie Lamb’s daughter, and she is A.D. She was a secret given to Eddie’s sister to stop Eddie losing his job. When Maya moved to Rosewood and found out the truth, she relapsed. On her return, Charlotte helped her fake her death to give her sister a free life with her mother Mary. It’s a pretty complex theory that goes into great detail, touching on Mary has a little Lamb (I.E. Maya Lamb) and ‘Maya Knew’.